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Personalised
Safety Plan
Your safety is the most important thing. Listed below are tips to
help keep you safe. The resources in this book can help you to make
a safety plan that works best for you. It is important to get help
with your safety plan. Many of the resources listed here can help
you.
If you are in an abusive relationship,
think about...
Having important phone numbers nearby for you and your children.
Numbers to have are the police, hotlines, friends and Women's Aid.
Friends or neighbours you could
tell about the abuse. Ask them to call the police if they hear angry
or violent noises. If you have children, teach them how to dial
999. Make up a code word that you can use when you need help.
How to get out of your home safely.
Practice ways to get out.
Safer places in your home where
there are exits and no weapons. If you feel abuse is going to happen
try to get your abuser to one of these safer places.
Any weapons in the house.
Think about ways that you could
get them out of the house.
Even if you do not plan to leave,
think of where you could go. Think of how you might leave. Try doing
things that get you out of the house - taking out the rubbish, walking
the pet or going to the shops. Put together a bag of things you
use everyday (see the checklist below). Hide it where it is easy
for you to get.
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Go over your safety plan often.
Women's Aid can help with
this and be ready to take
you and your children into safe accommodation.
If
you consider leaving your abuser, think about...
Four places you could go if you
leave your home.
People who might help you if you left.
Think about people who will keep a bag for you.
Think about people who might lend you money.
Make plans for your pets.
Keeping change for phone calls or top up cards for a mobile phone..
Opening a bank account or getting a credit card in your name.
Putting together a bag of things you use everyday. Hide it where
it is easy for you to get.
How you might leave.
Try doing things that get you out of the house - taking out the
rubbish, walking the family pet, or going to the shop. Practice
how you would leave.
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How you could take your
children with you safely.
There are times when taking your children with you may put all of
your lives in danger. You need to protect yourself to be able to
protect your children.
Here is a checklist of items
to take if you do leave
ITEMS TO TAKE, IF POSSIBLE
Children (if it is safe)
Money
Keys to car, house, work
Extra clothes
Medicine
Important papers for you and your children
Birth certificates
Social security cards
School and medical records
Bankbooks, credit cards
Driver's license
Car registration
DHSS identification
Passports.
Lease/rental agreement
Mortgage payment book, unpaid bills
Insurance papers
Divorce papers, custody orders
Marriage certificate
Address book
Pictures, jewellery, things that mean a lot to you
Items for your children (toys, blankets, etc.)
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If you
have left your abuser, think about...
Your
safety - you still need to.
Change the locks. Consider putting
in stronger doors, smoke and carbon monoxide detectors, a security
system and outside lights.
Tell friends and neighbours that
your abuser no longer lives with you. Ask them to call the police
if they see your abuser near your home or children.
Tell people who take care of your
children the names of people who are allowed to pick them up.
Tell someone at work about what
has happened. Ask that person to screen your calls. Think about
and practice a safety plan for your workplace. This should include
going to and from work.
Don't use the same shops or businesses
that you did when you were with your abuser.
Call someone if you feel down.
Safe way to speak with your abuser
if you must.
Going over your safety plan often.
WARNING:
Abusers try to control their victim's lives. When abusers feel a
loss of control - like when victims try to leave them - the abuse
often gets worse. Take special care when you leave. Keep being careful
even after you have left.
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